A Gringa's Guide to Getting Funky

This year, Havana faced an especially brutal winter. With temperatures dropping to the mid sixties for just under a week, locals shivered, avoided showers, and shuddered at the thought of having to wear a light sweater in the middle of January. But tonight, a balmy night breeze welcomes me at the Anfiteatro.

Starting off the Getting Funky in Havana, amidst celestial lights and fluorescent signs, Formell y Los Van Van’s vibrant performance draws everyone’s attention. Awakening into a sea of hands, the packed amphitheater sways to every song. Couples swiftly switch between casino steps, the pit coming alive with every drop, turn and swing. A current runs through the crowd, carrying a passionate and consistent rhythm.

While I can’t find any energy drinks at the venue, Armando Mandy Cantero seems to have chugged all of the Tigon’s within a 10 mile radius before stepping on stage. Erratically and erotically, his feet and hips never stop moving the entire performance. Mandy spins, gyrates and shimmies, humorously contrasting the group’s sophisticated vocals.

Además de un solo magnético de Cimafunk, el set incluye al trompetista estadounidense Maurice Brown. Para evitar repetirme, lo diré ahora: Brown toca todas las noches del festival. Todas las noches, sin excepción, con una sonrisa de oreja a oreja, además.

At one point, Abdel Lele Rasalps tosses his whole microphone, including the stand, to the crowd. Shortly after, Mandy follows, leaping into the pit. As the playful show comes to a close, it’s hard to tell whether the audience or band had more fun, a true testament to the group’s love for both their music and Cuban culture.

Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Back at the Anfiteatro, the second evening starts like strapping into an amusement ride. At first, spacey breaks fill the time between sets, then, suddenly, acts blur, spinning one into the other; whizzing, the SuperJam takes off.

Beneath the starry sky, a closely star-studded lineup illuminates the stage. Featuring X Alfonso, Wampi, Juan Carlos Marin and El Dray (and many, many other notables), new and longtime Cuban artists alike fuse together hits from the last century in Havana. Moving between jazz, salsa, pop, and reparto, these professional musicians play side by side with Cuban and American music students, coalescing generations, cultures and genres.

Among the program is a group of five objectively stunning women, known as Chik Soul, who periodically grace the stage. Their rendition of Aretha Franklin’s Respectis so unbelievably good, my friend confidently repeats that they must just be lip syncing to the original. Dressed in matching red sets and knee-high black platforms, the cover band dominates the evening's setlist, and I’m sure many wish they would dominate them as well.

Chik Soul at the Getting Funky in Havana Festival at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Chik Soul, alongside Anjelike Jelly Joseph’s leading vocals, then cover Staying Alive by the Bee Gees. An American karaoke classic, the overwhelmingly Cuban crowd enthusiastically sings the lyrics back, but only the words "staying alive", because, of course, nobody knows (or, more likely, understands) anything apart from the chorus. I can’t help but giggle a little.

Two LED signs, spelling out Havana and Funky, border the stage. A couple letters have burned out on the right side, leaving just the word “fun”. Our foreheads beading with sweat, either from dancing or pyrotechnics, we groove to Cimafunk’s beloved classic Me Voyas the concert wraps. Once the platform clears, "una más Wampi " echoes through the theater, a pleasant foreshadowing of the evening to come.

SuperJam at the Getting Funky in Havana Festival at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Twenty-three hours later, at the famed Salon Rosado de la Tropical, bordered by lush greenery and police guards with rifles, under a tarp — white, waterproof, and bordered by spotlights — the third night of Getting Funky unfolds.

Trombone Shorty and Orleans Avenue take the stage, accompanied by various other Cuban and American musicians and students. Seamlessly, the artists blend Afro-Cuban and African-American culture through their jazzy sonic fusion. As we wade through the puddles of people, a passerby, practically moaning, turns and says that Trombone Shorty’s riffing gave her full-body goosebumps.

During a brief intermission, the words WAMPI glow red, standing apart from the rostrum’s otherwise complete darkness. Following a cinematic black and white trailer about Dasiel’s lifelong musical journey, the second act begins with a bellowing cackle, leading into a Cubanified, instrumental version of Thriller. Soon after, Wampi enters the scene, saxophone-first, starting his set with the smooth and sultry Maleante.

He matches the backdrop, wearing a red jacket that says “PLAYBOY” alongside photos of a blonde flashing underboob, and a red baseball cap that says “Crack-Cocaine” in the Coca-Cola font. As the setlist cycles through Wampi’s own hits and tributes to the widely-adored El Taiger, a motif recurrent through every night of the festival, I slowly lose my voice.

Wampi at the Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at La Tropical's Salón Rosado. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Dancing along, the performance closes off with Por Ustedes (Pornosotros 2), a Wampi classic complete with choreography accompanying the chorus: ómate un jäger (drink a jaeger) y bájate el blumer (take off your panties). Moving to the Malecón, we share potato chips and beers until the sunrise sneaks up on us, mumbling the occasional Wampi ah, Wampi eh under our breath.

Waking up at the crack of 2:00 p.m., bleary and ruffled, I sluggishly trudge over to the dinner table for breakfast. Over cafecito and pan con queso, my grandma notes that the Tropical wasn’t nearly as packed last night as it usually is. She’s 82, so I’m not really sure where or how she got this information, but it’s true.

The crowd was thinner than the usual sardine-tin. Instead of bumping shoulders and dodging rum waterfalls, we were easily able to find pockets of space for dancing, so the slightly reduced turnout actually made for a much more enjoyable event.

Trombone Shorty and Orleans Avenue with Cuban and American music students at the Salón Rosado de la Tropical, during the Getting Funky in Havana Festival. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

After sleeping until dinnertime, we waltz back to the Anfiteatro for Getting Funky's coda. Thousands, squeezing through aisles and sneaking past barricades, shoulder bumping and rum waterfall dodging, await Alexander Abreu and Havana D’Primera.

Instead of haphazardly jotting typo-ridden half-thoughts in my notes app, tonight I’m equipped with a small hardcover notebook and pen, simultaneously under the guise and self-deception of being a serious, hard-hitting journalist.

The next morning, I check my notes. They simply read, “Ese gordo es un caliente.”.

Alexander Abreu at the Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

As for future Getting Funkyfestivals, there are a few things I would advise prospective attendees to get.

• Get your tickets in advance; most days seem to sell out in the afternoon.
• Get there early; arriving around the assumed showtime ensures you’ll avoid a line and secure a good view.
• Get your caffeine in beforehand; energy drinks are few and far between (only one of the six bars at the Tropical sold them, and none, to my knowledge, were available at the Anfiteatro) (and trust me, I looked).
• Get comfy shoes, an umbrella and/or a rain jacket; in case of any potential aguaceros.
• Get your ass in a salsa rueda class or two; in case of any potential casino circles.
• Get in the pit; this one is self explanatory.
• And, of course, get funky. If a blonde, blue-eyed, Boca Raton-born gringa can do it, so can you.

Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Los Van Van at the Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Big Chief Juan Pardo, at the Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Wampi at the Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at La Tropical's Salón Rosado. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Trombone Shorty at the Salón Rosado de la Tropical, during the Getting Funky in Havana Festival. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.

Getting Funky in Havana Festival, at the Old Havana Amphitheater. Photo: Courtesy of the organizers / Eduardo Reyes Aranzaes.